I really love to use this blog to record fun stories that I hope to remember in the future. And, occasionally, I feel the need to record a rant. No, I don't really want to remember this incident in the future. But I need to spill my guts somewhere, and why not publicly?
So, this week I came across a situation. We have been planning a family vacation for some time. In March I got everyone's passports in order and then tucked them in the very safe place I use for such things.
On Tuesday (well a week before departing)I decided to photocopy the passports and give them to some friends and relatives to keep for us. Well, I opened up the "very special place" to find all three of the kids passports right where they were supposed to be. For some reason mine wasn't there. Michael's wasn't there either. Well, I looked again, And again, and again. Then I started to tear the house apart and panic. I called and e-mailed Michael to see if he had taken them. He had taken his own and had it on his person.
But where was mine????
Those new passports have more than RF tags ... apparently they have legs and a will of their own. Who knew?
After admitting to myself that I had done the unthinkable: lost my passport, I decided this called for quick action.
I quickly filled out the government form explaining that I'd lost my passport. (A humbling experience). I filled out a new application. I ran down to get new photos taken that night. The next morning I took my stack of papers, itinerary, birth certificate, checkbook and three kids down to the county clerks office and explained my situation.
She gave me a sort of baffled look as I spread all the papers across her desk and she proceeded to pull out a big binder. I stood there with my heart in my throat. Really? Am I missing something? Or do you just not know what you are doing?
She excused herself for a moment and came back to the desk and glanced at my documents again. Then she said, "You don't need a passport to go to Costa Rica." Honestly inspires confidence in our fine educational system and our public office holders. (I used to work at FedEx and actually heard employees tell customers they needed an International Airbill to ship to New Mexico. Astounding).
After I assured her that I did need a passport to go to Costa Rica, I explained I was working with a passport expediting agency. I needed to have her watch me sign some documents and seal most of them into a government sealed envelope. "Uh, okay."
On the inside, my heart was now corroding the inside of my throat as I hold back a string of expletives and I felt like I might pass out.
She had me sign a few places and managed to wrestle with the stapler to get my photos on the pages. Once she got everything signed and in a neat pile she excused herself from the desk again.
She came back with a manilla envelope full of my documents. She put a stamp and signature on it then scotch taped it shut. Then she decided it didn't look very official or something and put another seal on top of the tape. But she thought it might smudge so she tested it by poking it with her finger. I reached across the desk and grabbed her hand before she smudged anything, "Why don't you just seal the whole thing with packing tape so it doesn't smudge?" She laughs, "What a good idea! We can just keep taping and sealing the package!! Ha ha ha ha!"
I guess she had no idea I was one step away from having a complete aneurism in front of everyone. Ha ha ha.
I finally made it out of there and then took my package down to FedEx/Kinko's. I used to work at FedEx (way back in the 1980's). Things have definitely changed for that company. Not for the better. And I really don't find them all that reliable or willing to please their customers. In spite of this, I tendered my package and breathed a sigh of temporary relief.
This morning I anxiously tracked my package on line. The last scan was in Memphis, TN last night. But it was well after 10:30AM in New York. So, I called FedEx. The woman on the phone said the last scan she saw was in Memphis last night. I agreed that I could see the same thing. So, where is my package? She could not answer that question. I asked if the scanners in New York were not working? Was there some kind of weather delay? Is my package going to be delivered today? She had no #$#@! clue.
"I have no clue. I'm a complete idiot. You are screwed. Have a nice day."
Unbelievable. When I worked at FedEx, I could call the local destination office and check on a package. I could put someone on hold and check for delays or down scanners. Now days a simple, "I don't know where your package is or when it's going to be delivered." is an acceptable answer??? What kind of customer service is that?
I called the passport expediting agency (which I should have done in the first place). They had received my package. Thank goodness!!!!! They couldn't find the itinerary (because it was in the sealed envelope). So, I quickly e-mailed them a copy.
Hopefully they will get this processed today and it will arrive back at my house tomorrow. Although, they will be shipping this FedEx. So, again, I am not completely confident.
After all this stress, I really am going to need a vacation.
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