Useless Cat!

Let it be known throughout the land that Mr. Whiskers (aka: Steve Austin, the $6 million cat) is utterly useless! He woke me up at 2:30am to go outside. Darn cat.

At 6:15am I stumbled into the kitchen and put on water for tea. I turned to get a glass of water when something sprang out of the garbage disposal toward my face. Naturally I screamed. I stood staring at the sink for a moment wondering if I had just imagined that. A dark gray shape sprang back up toward my face and fell back into the sink again. "Mouse!! Mouse!!! Mooooouuuuuuse!!!" I screamed in the hopes that someone would come rescue me. Who? Oh, you know, one of my children. They are so brave!

I never thought of myself as the type of woman who would shriek at the sight of a mouse. I think it was the combination of the utter surprise, followed by the suspense of wondering where it would go, would there be others? And then the larger issue: We have mice!

So, I screamed again, "Valerie!!! Mouse!! Mouse!!!"

Now, normally it's difficult to get the girls out of bed for school in the morning. But when Valerie heard her name followed by the word "mouse" out she ran. "Oh, it's one of those little jumper mice," she said. We discussed catching it and she put on some leather gloves as I ran to get a box. "What ever you do, Mommy, do not turn on the garbage disposal. It is already really wet and scared." With the authority of someone who has years of experience with these situations she took charge. "I need a flashlight. Okay, I can see he has lots of food and water down there, so he'll probably hide out a while. I'm going to have to go in after him. How much will you give me if I catch the mouse and turn it loose in the field down the street? $5? Okay."

And the next thing I know, it was done.

Later in the morning she was taking some scraps out to the chickens and came in to inform me that there is a squished mouse under the hinges of the nesting boxes in the chicken house.

Mr. Whiskers, you are so fired!