These Kids Today ...

I know I am really becoming that cranky old lady who stands out front her house with a shot gun loaded with rock salt yelling, "Hey! You kids! Get off my lawn!!!" when I title a post "These Kids Today ..."

First, I have to admit one of my many faults. I am entirely too neurotic about food. It's true. I drove to THREE different farms last week and had one deliver. I bought into a "cow share" so I could get raw milk straight from the cow. I had some grass finished beef delivered to my house. I drove out to another farm to pick up freshly harvested, grass pastured chickens. And then I made my weekly trip out to get my greens from GRUB. I mean, who does that? In the mean time I spent some time e-mailing and calling my senators about the latest agricultural bill that threatens small local farms and tries to regulate everything under the FDA to make my food "safer". Well, with the stellar track record the FDA has ... I just don't trust the government to provide me with safe food. I do trust my local farmer, if I meet them and see their farming practices. (Wow ... I really am sounding like a cranky old lady. How old am I???)



Okay, now I can move on to my rant. My kids like to have friends over, of course. Who doesn't? Some of their friends are really polite and will try just about any crazy food I put in front of them. Other kids drive me insane. My daughter had this one friend over who refused to eat ANYTHING. My peanut butter only had peanuts in it. Imagine that. My bread was the wrong color (not white). I didn't have grape jelly. My chocolate chip cookies weren't like the ones her mom makes (she apparently buys the rolls of pre-made dough and slices them on to cookie sheets). Mine were, of course, homemade with organic ingredients and eggs from my chickens. I didn't advertise that. But I take great pride in what I produce in my kitchen.



My recent encounter was with Rex's friend sleeping over. I knew his friend was a picky eater. I have a hard time giving that kid anything to eat. So, Rex asked when his friend was coming to dinner. I told Rex he had to warn his friend that we were having hamburgers without buns and sweet potato fries from the oven. If his friend wasn't willing to eat that, he'd better come over after dinner. Apparently, fully informed, this kid decided to come over for dinner. I have to admit he choked down the hamburger, but that was it.

After dinner he asked if he could have ice cream. I had to inform him that we didn't have ice cream in the house. And I didn't want to give my kids sugar right before bed (it always results in leg cramps and nightmares and less sleep for me). He reminded me that last time he came over we had ice cream. I started to feel like a really bad hostess. I figured he was still hungry. So, I offered him a glass of milk. He drank it right down and asked if we could watch a movie. My kids are used to not watching movies on the weekend (except special circumstances). Rex was outside building some crazy structure and the girls were entertaining themselves as usual. This kid was hounding me for sugar and entertainment. (Well, that's how it felt. He has threatened my son before that he was just going to go home if he didn't get to play video games and drink soda -- he knows we don't do that here).



Finally, I caved. I didn't want to be a bad hostess. We had a movie, Fantastic Mr. Fox, that seemed rated for the whole family. I offered to make popcorn too. We had to pause the movie while he phoned his mom to bring over his pillow and blankets. I was informed he couldn't watch a movie unless he was comfortable. Anyhow, I think we finally fed him enough and made him comfortable.



At 7:30am on Sunday morning there came a knock on my bedroom door. Rex announced that his friend was hungry. I had anticipated this. Last night I started some pancake batter (freshly milled organic spelt flour soaked in a yogurt mixture). I got up and brushed my teeth and came out here to start breakfast. His friend then announced that I should nevermind as he just called his mom to come get him. I offered to make bacon and eggs, a bowl of cereal, a glass of milk, pancakes, whatever. Nope. He was going home. Plus, his mom apparently makes pancakes that spray out of a can "like spray on cheese".

I can't compete with that. So, if you want to get rid of your company in the morning, be sure to whip up the following:

(based on the recipe from Nourishing Traditions by Sally Fallon):

2 cups freshly ground spelt or whole wheat flour
2 cups kefir or yogurt/milk mixture or buttermilk
2 eggs (separated)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking soda
3 tablepoons melted butter

Soak flour in milk mixture overnight. In the morning separate eggs and melt butter. Whisk melted butter into yolks, combine with whites and add with rest of ingredients to batter. Drop 1/4 cup batter on well heated griddle (use coconut oil or ghee). Turn when bubbles appear.

Add blueberries or other berries to batter if you wish. Serve with butter and real maple syrup after your company goes home.



So, I understand that I'm entirely too neurotic about food. I know that my kids encounter cookie dough out of a can, soda, spray on cheese, grape jelly, chips and candybars at other people's houses. And I'm okay with that because I offer really healthy food here. But I hope my kids have good manners and at least try different foods at other people's houses. I really beat myself up this morning for not being "the cool mom" with all the junk food, movies and video games kids love. But if it would give my kids manners like this, then perhaps I'm not sorry.

I am now done with my Sunday morning rant. You can send your contributions toward therapy to my home address.